The Girl Next Door

The Girl Next Door keeps me in business. She has a constant broken heart and has the self-esteem that is comparable to that of a blind and deaf dog at the animal shelter. The problem is that she is a beauty that the world has forgotten to acknowledge. She is what is referred to as the salt of the earth and the peace that holds others together. Her friends seek her out for comfort. They look to her for words of wisdom.

Who holds her together? No one. She would never ask anyone to help her when she is capable of helping herself. Only her Mother has seen her cry.

As girls we learn from our Mothers how to be strong, how to always maintain composure and to never be a burden. The Girl Next Door is in a constant progression for making the world and others around her a better place. She works to please others, her parents, her friends, her teachers, her church, while doing her best all at she does.

Words used to describe the girl next door include wholesome, sweet, virgin, honest, trustworthy, fun, feminine, best friend or even buddy. (Note the words used to describe the girl next door has nothing to do with Hugh Hefner or double D cup sizes. )

Recently a writer from Askmen.com wrote an article as to why men should marry the girl next door and what dangers to look out for in doing so. The girl next door is constantly being taken advantage of and I believe perceptions like this may be why.

This is how Andy Ajzenkopf, Relationship Correspondent, describes her:

She's a homebody. She cooks, cleans and is not afraid of being at home, helping out with chores. Plus, she's not a fan of clubbing. She thinks the nightclub scene consists of horny drunks and game players who don't live honestly. And after all the not-so-great game players you've dated, this is a refreshing, alluring and potentially life-altering change for your dating scenario.

She's nurturing and sweet. Unlike so many of the women you've dated who had militant stances against being nice to you simply because you were a man, she's understanding of your needs and is willing to take care of you when you're sick. Her sweet demeanor -- and knowing that what goes around comes around -- makes you want to be with her and take care of her in kind.

She doesn't attract attention. She's "under the radar," so to speak. Guys won't hit on her everywhere you go; not because she's unattractive, but because she prefers to remain low-key, both in her appearance and her attitude. She's neither a flirt nor is she flashy; but she has that natural beauty that doesn't require coats of makeup.

She's predictable and safe. What you see is what you get. You'll always know where you stand with her, as well as where she stands on any given topic. There's no guesswork involved and that makes her a welcome change from all the women who've played head games with you before.



She's low maintenance. This is one of her best qualities. You won't have to constantly buy her jewelry and other such gifts to keep her interested. She even enjoys just slumming-it for a night in or out with you. Jeans and a T-shirt are fashionable enough for a stroll around town. But here's the kicker: when the occasion calls for it, she dresses to the nines.



She has family values. Because she comes from a solid family upbringing, she believes in the importance of family. If you ever want to be a dad, this is the woman you want as the mother of your children.


She has a good personality. Although this is not something you'd want to hear about someone you're meeting on a blind date, the girl next door is easygoing and able to joke around with you about all kinds of topics. You can go anywhere with her and never get annoyed. She doesn't complain, but she does speak her mind honestly and with respect for your feelings.



She's trustworthy and reliable. You can take her word to the bank. If she tells you she is going to do something or be somewhere, it's set in stone. You could give her your credit cards and never worry that she'll overspend. Now that's a headache you'll be glad to avoid.

To me it sounds like if you are a man and you want to live with your Mother then you need to marry the girl next door. Wow, girls aren’t we lucky. I wonder why the divorce rate is so high? It sounds like Mr. Ajzenkopf is explaining to men why they should take advantage of a Girl Next Door. They are sweet, low maintenance, other men won’t find them attractive, good personality and trustworthy. The way the girl next door is described is almost as if she does not deserve to go out, to have nice things, and to not be romanced because she is not demanding. She was taught to be low maintenance growing up and never a burden.

The best part of this article is when the author continues to go into detail as to what is wrong with the girl next door.

She's not a challenge. Let's face it; after some time with her, you may become bored. If you usually enjoy the spice that comes with a certain amount of frustration in a relationship, then she will not be the one to scratch the confrontational itch. Once you have her, the chase is over and you may eventually view her as a steadfast nuisance more than the sweet girl you thought you found.

She's predictable and safe. If you don't like spontaneity, then this isn't a problem. However, because she will never waver from the tried and true habits and experiences, you might have a problem spicing up your relationship just when you feel it's most crucial to do so. Can you say vanilla sex?

She might be playing you. The worst possible thing to discover is that this was all an act. She really is that wild child party girl who sucked you in with the "nice girl" facade, and all of a sudden, you're back playing the same relationship games that drove you to her in the first place.

The girl next door is the girl I have spend countless hours with on my couch, they are broken, worn down and tired. They are on the edge of becoming bitter and resentful.

I agree they are all those wonderful things as described, they love, hope and believe. However I feel that their ability to love, hope and to believe in others is what may be the very thing that sets them up for disappointment, especially when they are taken advantage of.

What and who are they believing in? Is their faith being displaced?

What type of man is drawn to this woman? What does he has to offer her? These men who want to marry the girl next door, are the boys who ditched her, for the cheerleader on prom. The seek her out as prey and as a trophy.

“She is just a friend, she understands." Sure she does. Boys, you have to realize, your indecisive hormones are breaking these young women. Each time you reject her you destroy a piece of her. Tom Petty, even makes reference to this girl in a couple of his songs, going as far as saying “all the good girls are all at home with broken hearts.” The girl next door is the good girl.

The girl next door is looking for her night in shinning armor. He will ride in on his horse. He will slam her against the wall, rip off her clothes and will treat her like a fantasy. He will be honest above all else. He will adore her, akin to God himself. Their relationship will be a constant challenge filled with excitement. She is anything but predictable and has been saving her deep emotions for this very man.

Who is the real girl next door?

She does not sleep, she cries and wishes she were someone or somewhere else. She desires to be noticed, desires to be desired and prays that some day she will. She is in constant worry about her appearance despite her illusion that she is not. She values the opinions of others and lives in this constant bondage of others peoples thoughts and ideas.

When she is in a relationship she is in a constant state of anxiety. She believes that at some point she will be replaced without notice and with something more attractive. Not, someone, but something. She wants bigger breast, a smaller waistline and better hair. No matter how beautiful she may be the men in her life prove time and time again there is always something better and the girl next door is never enough.

So she waits. She waits for prince charming to sweep her away. She prays for him, googles for him and searches relentlessly for him. Will he be what she deserves when she finds him? Will she even be aware that he is her prince or be to jaded to let down her guard.

Bettie Page who is a favorite among pin-up girls once said, “I was never the girl next door.” She was the girl next door, she was a great student, voted most likely to succeed, Salutatorian of her high school and cared for her two sisters. (official website biography)

What caused the drastic change in her life to move from the next door to the set made for a pinup girl?

What was she trying to prove?

The girl next door is more than just the girl to be taken advantage of.

The girl next door will pick up a whip and start beating ass when provoked and will look amazing while doing it.